Wednesday, March 20, 2013


One often meets his destiny on the road he tries to avoid it”

Well two days of absolute splendor had already passed in Kotdwar. Today was the third day and it was a sunny morning. Me and Ranjan Ji had just reached Shafa Home, Kotdwar. We were discussing on the way how we had forgotten to bring the milk bottle, stamp and stamp pad. We were all set for the day and ready to work.

At Shafa, Balbir Ji was ready to leave for the market and all of a sudden there was a need of the stamp and the stamp pad as Balbir Ji would take the cheques along. Ranjan Ji called me and asked to get the stamp pad and the empty bottle of milk from the house.

I asked Tarun to drive me to the house and back. On reaching home at the gate downstairs I got the fright of my life. I had forgotten the keys to Ranjan Ji’s room. I was finished. Without even thinking for a moment I sent Tarun back to Shafa to get the keys from Ranjan Ji. I knew I would get blasted but at least the work would be done once I get the keys to his room.
I went upstairs took the other stuff (milk bottles etc.) from the kitchen and stood outside waiting for Tarun to come back, thinking all kind of justifications to give for the forgotten key.

I was talking on the mobile when all of a sudden I got a bigger shock. I could very well feel like a cardiac patient who has had two major attacks in a row. I didn’t know what to do. All of a sudden, all the six feelings pain, shame, anger, hurt, guilt and fear were all over me. I saw the door to Ranjan Ji’s room, NOT LOCKED. He had just put the latch on but there was no lock. I didn’t know what to do? Curse myself or kill?? Suddenly there were no words coming out of my mouth. My forehead had suddenly become wet with droplets of sweat on it. My stomach suddenly started getting bumps in it.

I suddenly went into a trance and started working mechanically. Went inside the room. Searched for the stamp pad. Locked the main door and started walking frantically back to Shafa. I had no hope of the car coming back to pick me up. On the contrary I was worried with what’s going to happen. A phone call came and I stood still. The call ended for two minutes and I was all red. It was…you know who. I was asked to come back running. With my kind of pleasantly plump body (whoever of you have seen me) I couldn’t last for long. So I took lift in a bike and reached Shafa. My luck I did not receive a CHAANTA!!

Sir Ji says TO BE AWARE IS TO BE ALIVE. Be aware while speaking, be aware while eating, be aware while doing anything, even in toilet. I was very ashamed as Ranjan Ji trusts me very much and when you trust somebody and he does such a thing, it blows you out. Moreover listening to things carefully is very essential thing. The day before itself Ranjan Ji had told me that he usually doesn’t lock his door when he is in town and I didn’t register it at all. It’s been three years that I've been in recovery but Ranjan Ji didn’t hesitate to give me an Learniing Experience to make me run to Shafa. Simple reason being he cannot see me being a NIMKAMPOO. 

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