Shafa

healing the feeling by feeling the healing

Monday, October 27, 2014

IS AN ADDICT LYING TO YOU? HOW TO DEAL WITH LYING BEHAVIOUR

For many addicts, as the addiction gets worse, lying becomes deeply ingrained in their way of life and it actually becomes incredibly difficult to tell the truth. And, if they have been getting away with weaving a web of lies and nobody has called them out on it, it only seems logical to think that lying is just simply easier than telling the truth. That is why it is very important to deal with the lies in an appropriate manner. Here are a few tips on how to deal with them in a way that's beneficial to both you and your loved one:

1. Don't take it personally
When a loved one lies to you, it can feel as though they no longer love or respect you, and this can cause a great amount of emotional pain. You must remember, however, that an addict mainly lies for their own benefit – to keep the reality of their situation from surfacing. And in fact, an addict often believes that by lying to a loved one, it is causing them less pain with a ‘what you don't know won't hurt you' type of attitude. Instead of getting upset and yelling at them or reacting negatively towards them, take it with a grain of salt and focus your energy on helping them get out of their situation instead.

2. Stop enabling
If you know that your loved one is lying to you, pretending to believe them, or turning a blind eye will only encourage their behavior and allow them to sink deeper into their addiction. Whether they think you actually believe them, or they know you're turning a blind eye, you're essentially telling them that their behavior is okay. Instead, you need to let them know that you know the truth.  When the lies are no longer working, it will help force them into honesty and (hopefully) in to asking for the help they need.

3. Point out the truths
When negative incidents occur, such as arrests, medical issues, loss of job, or anything that is visible to you (and not just to the person struggling with addiction) it is helpful for you to point it out. Do your best to sound non-judgmental and definitely not condescending. However, it is important for your loved one to realize that their actions are having negative impacts, and that others can see that and are also being affected by them.

4. Boost their confidence
When an addict feels shame, it fuels their addiction. Therefore, you can help them by creating a supportive environment where they feel they can be open and honest with you. You can also build their confidence and encourage them to create goals again by literally listing for them the things that would be better if they got treatment for their addiction. Most addicts feel a sense of emptiness when they imagine their life without their substance, so help fill that void with reminders of how good life was before the activities that you used to enjoy together or those that they enjoyed doing alone.


5. Get them some help
If it's clear to you that your loved one is suffering from addiction, it is important to get them help right away. It does no good for you or them if you continue to be in denial yourself. You can start by contacting your family doctor for guidance in finding the most appropriate treatment, and get them into a rehabilitation program as soon as possible. The sooner the addict gets help, the better their chances of recovery.

Shafa Home offers treatment for both substance and process or behavioral addictions with a program that is highly personalized and culturally sensitive.

(These articles are the sole property of “The Cabin Chiang Mai”, they are its original authors.)


Friday, October 17, 2014

KEEP YOUR KIDS SAFE FROM SUBSTANCE ABUSE IN THE NEW SCHOOL YEAR

Millions of underage teens around the world abuse alcohol and drugs each year. Make sure your teen isn't one of them. Back-to-school season is a flurry of activity for parents of adolescents and teenagers. Clothes, electronics, accessories, and signing up for extra classes can make an already busy schedule seem overwhelming. And yet it is important to be mindful of the limits and expectations we set for our children, if they are to successfully navigate the peer pressure they may encounter at school.

#1 Set Firm Limits About Alcohol Use
Children learn much of how they should respond and be expected to behave from experiences at home. Some research suggests that at six years old, children understand that alcohol is off-limits to kids. In fact, many children have formed the impression that drinking is not a big deal by age 14. Where do they get these messages? Primarily at home. This means that while there are many influences we cannot control, such as media and the internet, we can influence some of these expectations from the home front.
The following are useful strategies for creating healthy attitudes towards and behaviours with alcohol. First, consume alcohol responsibly and communicate that underage drinking is not acceptable. Second, there is considerable research that shows that when parents are more engaged in their children's lives, their offspring are at significantly less risk for using drugs and alcohol. So, be sure to keep track of your child's activities and friends and maintain trust through caring communication.
#2 Do Not Use Illicit Drugs
Alcohol use, though carrying great health, financial, and social risks, is legal in almost every country. In contrast illicit drug use poses additional risks because of legal and criminal liabilities. For this reason, it is important to set a positive example and abstain from drug use.
This is equally true for marijuana, which is now becoming legal or de-criminalised in some areas. While gaining greater social acceptance, marijuana nonetheless poses health and behavioural risks, especially for developing children. Teenagers who chronically use marijuana have shown significant changes in their personality as well as their academic performance. Therefore, it is important to avoid exposing teens to drug use of any kind, including marijuana.
#3 Be Careful with “Study Aids”
Teenagers are under a lot of pressure to get good grades. A great number of students are now prescribed stimulants to treat attention deficit and hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), such as Ritalin or Adderall. These days, however, more and more students who do not have a prescription are getting access to these drugs and using them for studying. It is important that you explain the dangers and risks of using drugs without a prescription so that your children avoid these powerful stimulants.
If you are concerned about addiction, please contact one of our specialists today.

(These articles are the sole property of “The Cabin Chiang Mai”, they are its original authors.)