IS AN ADDICT LYING TO YOU? HOW TO DEAL WITH LYING BEHAVIOUR

For many addicts, as the addiction gets worse, lying becomes deeply ingrained in their way of life and it actually becomes incredibly difficult to tell the truth. And, if they have been getting away with weaving a web of lies and nobody has called them out on it, it only seems logical to think that lying is just simply easier than telling the truth. That is why it is very important to deal with the lies in an appropriate manner. Here are a few tips on how to deal with them in a way that's beneficial to both you and your loved one:

1. Don't take it personally

When a loved one lies to you, it can feel as though they no longer love or respect you, and this can cause a great amount of emotional pain. You must remember, however, that an addict mainly lies for their own benefit – to keep the reality of their situation from surfacing. And in fact, an addict often believes that by lying to a loved one, it is causing them less pain with a ‘what you don't know won't hurt you' type of attitude. Instead of getting upset and yelling at them or reacting negatively towards them, take it with a grain of salt and focus your energy on helping them get out of their situation instead.

2. Stop enabling

If you know that your loved one is lying to you, pretending to believe them, or turning a blind eye will only encourage their behavior and allow them to sink deeper into their addiction. Whether they think you actually believe them, or they know you're turning a blind eye, you're essentially telling them that their behavior is okay. Instead, you need to let them know that you know the truth.  When the lies are no longer working, it will help force them into honesty and (hopefully) in to asking for the help they need.

3. Point out the truths

When negative incidents occur, such as arrests, medical issues, loss of job, or anything that is visible to you (and not just to the person struggling with addiction) it is helpful for you to point it out. Do your best to sound non-judgmental and definitely not condescending. However, it is important for your loved one to realize that their actions are having negative impacts, and that others can see that and are also being affected by them.

4. Boost their confidence

When an addict feels shame, it fuels their addiction. Therefore, you can help them by creating a supportive environment where they feel they can be open and honest with you. You can also build their confidence and encourage them to create goals again by literally listing for them the things that would be better if they got treatment for their addiction. Most addicts feel a sense of emptiness when they imagine their life without their substance, so help fill that void with reminders of how good life was before the activities that you used to enjoy together or those that they enjoyed doing alone.

5. Get them some help

If it's clear to you that your loved one is suffering from addiction, it is important to get them help right away. It does no good for you or them if you continue to be in denial yourself. You can start by contacting your family doctor for guidance in finding the most appropriate treatment, and get them into a rehabilitation program as soon as possible. The sooner the addict gets help, the better their chances of recovery.

Shafa Home offers treatment for both substance and process or behavioral addictions with a program that is highly personalized and culturally sensitive.

(These articles are the sole property of “The Cabin Chiang Mai”, they are its original authors.)

KEEP YOUR KIDS SAFE FROM SUBSTANCE ABUSE IN THE NEW SCHOOL YEAR

Millions of underage teens around the world abuse alcohol and drugs each year. Make sure your teen isn't one of them. Back-to-school season is a flurry of activity for parents of adolescents and teenagers. Clothes, electronics, accessories, and signing up for extra classes can make an already busy schedule seem overwhelming. And yet it is important to be mindful of the limits and expectations we set for our children, if they are to successfully navigate the peer pressure they may encounter at school.

#1 Set Firm Limits About Alcohol Use

Children learn much of how they should respond and be expected to behave from experiences at home. Some research suggests that at six years old, children understand that alcohol is off-limits to kids. In fact, many children have formed the impression that drinking is not a big deal by age 14. Where do they get these messages? Primarily at home. This means that while there are many influences we cannot control, such as media and the internet, we can influence some of these expectations from the home front.

The following are useful strategies for creating healthy attitudes towards and behaviours with alcohol. First, consume alcohol responsibly and communicate that underage drinking is not acceptable. Second, there is considerable research that shows that when parents are more engaged in their children's lives, their offspring are at significantly less risk for using drugs and alcohol. So, be sure to keep track of your child's activities and friends and maintain trust through caring communication.

#2 Do Not Use Illicit Drugs

Alcohol use, though carrying great health, financial, and social risks, is legal in almost every country. In contrast illicit drug use poses additional risks because of legal and criminal liabilities. For this reason, it is important to set a positive example and abstain from drug use.

This is equally true for marijuana, which is now becoming legal or de-criminalised in some areas. While gaining greater social acceptance, marijuana nonetheless poses health and behavioural risks, especially for developing children. Teenagers who chronically use marijuana have shown significant changes in their personality as well as their academic performance. Therefore, it is important to avoid exposing teens to drug use of any kind, including marijuana.

#3 Be Careful with “Study Aids”

Teenagers are under a lot of pressure to get good grades. A great number of students are now prescribed stimulants to treat attention deficit and hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), such as Ritalin or Adderall. These days, however, more and more students who do not have a prescription are getting access to these drugs and using them for studying. It is important that you explain the dangers and risks of using drugs without a prescription so that your children avoid these powerful stimulants.

If you are concerned about addiction, please contact one of our specialists today.

(These articles are the sole property of “The Cabin Chiang Mai”, they are its original authors.)

BE CAREFUL HOW AND WHAT YOU SAY TO A RECOVERING ADDICT !!!

Using certain types of language when talking to addicts can both aid and hinder recovery. Learn how to help an addict with these language tips.

Addiction has such a long history, and has affected every group of persons, that there is an abundance of language to talk about it.  Portrayals and discussions of substance abuse and other addictions have spread far into mainstream culture, and are not simply the purview of those affected by addiction. It is little wonder that most people, whether or not they have been acquainted with addiction, have some knowledge of how to talk about it. The question is what language will best support those going through the recovery process.

Sometimes, unintentionally, words can actually get in the way of recovery. 

To begin with, the language we use should be “people-first language.” In the past, language for people who suffer from addictions has often not reflected that they are individuals. Instead, it has referred to people based on their group membership. For example, “addicts,” or “alcoholics.” Person-first language is language that recognises that whatever their condition, people are individuals. Appropriate language from this perspective includes “persons with addiction” or “a person with an alcohol addiction.”

In addition to putting people first, language should reflect the medical nature of addiction. There are many colloquial or everyday terms that can be used in connection with substance abuse, such as “junkie,” “habit.” Such terms obscure the medical nature of addiction as a disease, and in some cases hide the harm that results from addiction. Therefore, using terms that characterise addiction as a health issue are preferred. Such language includes terms such as “substance use disorder” and “alcohol addiction.”

Another consideration for language is that it should promote recovery. Whether we are aware of it or not, language can subtly reinforce the notion that recovery is a difficult process. For example, terms such as “resistant” and “unmotivated” used in relation to people in recovery treatment classify people in a negative light and can undermine their recovery. It is preferred to use terms such as “has not begun” or “experiencing ambivalence to change” which focus on choices those in recovery are making.

Finally, slang and idioms are to be avoided. When we use these, we often perpetuate negative stereotypes and biases about addiction.

Several caveats are in order. First, when communicating with clients, it may be necessary to use language that is most appropriate and can be understood. So, sometimes a client may use terms that are not the best choices, and we may consciously use the same terms to facilitate rapport. Nevertheless, we can model more appropriate terms.

Secondly, language is fluid and changing. Words that were used in the past are no longer the best choices, and what we use today may in turn fall out of use. As language itself evolves, it is important to be aware of how new meanings potentially affect best practice.

In the end, these guidelines are meant to support people in their recovery, and that purpose should be the primary consideration, rather than the right-ness or wrong-ness of a particular word.

If you are concerned about addiction, please contact one of our specialists today.

(These articles are the sole property of “The Cabin Chiang Mai”, they are its original authors.)